Bros Before Hoes
by eskie02
Summary: Yet another new girl moves to South Park but she is causing trouble between two "Super Best Friends" and that's not even the worst part. She enjoys making them fight over her, it gives her such pleasure. Oh and did I mention she just might team Eric Cartman himself. So please R
1. Chapter 1

The day started off like any other in small mountain town of South Park with four boys standing waiting at the bus stop. "Did you assholes hear that we are getting another new kid today?" Cartman asked

"As long as it's not another fat ass like you," Kyle smirked

"Shut up Kahl!" Cartman snapped "You fucking Jew!"

Stan and Kenny rolled their eyes because they both knew that a full blown argument was about to start. By the time the bus pulled the two feuding boys looked as if they wanted to rip each others throats out.

"Don't you two ever get tired of arguing?" Stan asked Kyle as they took a seat together

"I hate his fucking guts," Kyle replied through gritted teeth.

"Cartman's just a dick,"

"No Cartman's a racist asshole prick!" Kyle spat.

Before arriving at school the bus stopped and the new kid got on, everyone looked up. The new kid was a girl with long wavy dark almost black hair that went down to the middle of her back. Her favorite color must have been aqua because that is the color hat and gloves she wore. As she walked past the boys her eyes flashed over towards Stan and Kyle and she gave a sweet smile.

"Dude," Kyle said "that new chick just smiled at me."

"Are you sure dude?" Stan asked "I think she was looking at me."

Kyle just shook his head "Nah uh...it was me."

At school the new girl was introduced to everyone by Mr. Garrison "Class this Jenna Hines our new student..." he said before rolling his eyes and saying "because God knows why we need another one."

"Hi Jenna!" the class all said together.

"Now Jenna go sit down next to Eric Cartman," Mr Garrison said pointing towards the empty seat.

"Aw Jesus Christ," Cartman mumbled as the girl made her way over to the seat next to him.

"Hi," she said sweetly

"Fuck off bitch," he hissed at her

She just shrugged it off and listened to Mr Garrison's lesson about nothing important.

At lunch the new girl was already sitting with the other fourth grade girls. "I know you are new but are there any boys you think are cute so far?" Bebe asked

Jenna smiled slightly before turning back towards the boys "Maybe."

"Just as long as it's not my boyfriend, " Wendy laughed "unless you want me to kick your ass."

"Which one is your boyfriend?" Jenna asked

"Stan," she replied happily "he's my man."

"Ew gross," Jenna said screwing up her face "he's not even cute."

The other girls giggled a bit "I know right, " Bebe smiled "I've been telling her that for years."

"Shut up Bebe!" Wendy snapped

While the two girls argued Jenna found herself sneaking another peek back at the boys and she couldn't help but to smile slightly. Her eyes fell upon the same two boys from earlier and smiled grew, she was differently going to have fun messing with people's minds here.

**Here is the first chapter...I know there is a lot of oc stories on here but I promise this one is going to be slightly different. What do you think should I continue it? Please leave a review... **


	2. Chapter 2

"Dude that new chick is a real bitch," Cartman huffed as he sat at the table with his lunch

"Why's that Fatass?" Kyle smirked "Because she's smarter then you?"

"Shut Kahl!" Cartman snapped "That bitch is not smarter then meh!"

"Guys can we talk about something else besides that new chick," Stan sighed

"Like what?" Kyle asked

Kenny muffled something before laughing

"How do you know all girls have cats?" Stan asked

Kenny laughed again

"Anyway," Kyle said slowly "what did you want to talk about Stan?"

"Important things like this new fifth grader that keeps hitting on my girlfriend,"

"Yes I can see how that's a real problem," Cartman said rolling his eyes

"Really?" Stan asked

"No," he laughed

Stan frowned and turned his attention to a text he had just received from Wendy...

:We need to talk...:

"Shit," he thought because he knew perfectly well that every time she said that they were about to break up.

Before he could even text back he got another text

:I'm breaking up with you:

"What the hell did I do?" he asked himself before turning back to her and which she refused to make any eye contact with him.

"What's wrong dude?" Kyle asked

"Wendy just broke up with me," sighed Stan

Cartman found this funny and just bursted into a fit of laughter..."Oh mah God!" he laughed "she broke up with you through a text message!"

"Oh Dude I'm so sorry," Kyle said placing a supporting hand on his friend's shoulder.

"How could she do this to me?" Stan sighed

"Fuck her Dude," Kyle said "you don't need."

"Dude she was my life," Stan explained

"It's going to be ok Dude," Kyle tried to explain but Stan was to depressed to listen and just on and on about him and Wendy.

"Great now he's going to be a fucking cry baby again," Cartman said rolling his eyes.

After school that day Stan didn't feel like hanging out with his friends, he just felt like feeling sorry for himself alone up in his room.

He just settled into his room when he heard his mother call him from downstairs.

"Stan someone is here to see you!"

"Goddamn it," he breathed "what do those assholes want?"

He frowned as he walked downstairs expecting to see his friends but was shocked when he saw someone completely different.

"I made you some cookies." Jenna said smiling holding out a plate.

He looked from her to the plate of cookies "Why?"

"Because I heard about how Wendy broke up with you and I just wanted to say sorry," she frowned innocently.

"Oh how sweet," Stan's Mom said from behind them

"Do you want to try one?" Jenna asked smiling sweetly

Stan shrugged his shoulders before taking one and biting it. The taste of the cook was heavenly "Dude you made these?"

Jenna nodded "Yeah...my Mom is a baker and she's teaching me how to bake things."

"That's cool," Stan replied before taking another bite of his cookie

Jenna smiled before placing the plate on the coffee table "Well I got to go, see in you in school."

"Bye I guess," Stan replied

With Jenna gone Stan was just about to sit down and have another cookie when Kyle came walking through the door.

"Dude we need to talk." he said as he walked over to his friend "you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself every time Wendy breaks up with you."

"Oh hey Dude," Stan greeted just now noticing that Kyle was there "what's up?"

Kyle raised an eyebrow "Dude are you feeling ok?"

Stan nodded " I think so...wanna cookie?"

Kyle looked down at the plate of cookies "Where did you get those?"

"That new chick made them and brought them over,"

"Your telling me that the new chick brought you a plate of cookies?" Kyle asked crossing his arms and raising his eyebrow again.

"Yeah," Stan shrugged

"Cool," Kyle said before sitting down next to his friend and taking a cookie.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxo

"Hi boys," Jenna greeted as she walked past park where the four boys playing basket ball "can I play?"

"Chicks can't play basket ball," Cartman smirked

"They can too," she argued "besides I just wanted to just toss the ball one time."

"Fuck off bitch!" Cartman snapped

Jenna glared at him before her eyes fell upon the two boys standing closest to the hoop...

"We already have four players so you can't play," Kyle explained

"Well can I watch then?"

"Uh...sure," he shrugged

Jenna smiled sweetly at him before skipping over to the bench and sitting down.

"Can believe that bitch wanted to play with us guys?" Cartman asked as he started to dribble the ball

"Heads up!" someone shouted as a frisbee came flying out of nowhere and hitting Cartman right in the face.

"Dude are you ok?" Stan asked as he and Kyle came rushing over to him

"Why are there four of you guys?" he asked

"Dude maybe you should take a break," Stan suggested

"Oh my gosh!" Jenna exclaimed rushing back over "is he ok?"

"He's fine," Kyle said trying to keep a straight face

Jenna could tell he wanted to laugh at what happened to the fat boy "I could take his place until he's feeling better."

"You don't have to do that," Stan explained "we'll just wait until he's feeling better."

"Are you afraid of losing to a girl?" she asked placing her hands on her hips.

Kyle and Stan looked at each other "Kenny and I against you two."

Jenna smiled as she carefully took the ball away from Stan who had picked up after Cartman was hit and started dribbling it "Well are we playing or not?"

The two boys shrugged before they started to play. Jenna used being a girl to her advange by flirting with one of the boys when they had the ball.

By the time Cartman was back to normal his friends were done playing..."I'm thirsty," Jenna said "anyone else...my treat?"

"Sure," all three of them shrugged

Jenna turned back to Cartman "You can come too."

Cartman followed only because he would be getting a free drink. Jenna led the boys to her house where she gave each one of them a can orange soda.

"Thanks for letting me play boys," she said sweetly

"It's cool," Kyle smiled "I've never seen a girl play as good as you."

Jenna smiled "You're just saying that."

"No you are a really good player," Stan agreed

"We should do it again real soon," Jenna smiled

"Kay," both boys said.

"Cool," she replied

**Next Chapter coming soon and that's when the fun begins...**


	3. Chapter 3

Jenna had a plan that she would get two boys to fight over her because that something that she really enjoyed, seeing the close friendships just crumble. She did not know why she just found it funny how such good friends would fight over her. An evil smile formed on her face as she remembered the two boys from the last town she was just in and how she completely ruined their friendship. She could sense the strong friendship between Stan and Kyle and that's why she chose them...well beside the fact that it made her feel sick to see people who were that close of friends. She carefully packed the last of her items in a basket before walking off towards Kyle's house.

Putting on her "sweet" face she knocked on the door.

"Hello?" A woman who Jenna guessed was his mom asked as she answered the door.

"You must be Kyle's Mom," Jenna said sweetly

"Why yes I am," the woman smiled "and who are you?"

"My name is Jenna Hines, my family just moved here from Seattle and I was wondering if your son is home?"

Mrs. Broflovski raised an eyebrow as she looked down at the girl "Well Kyle's not here," she replied

Jenna put on a disappointed face "He's not?"

"He spent the night at his friend Stan's house,"

"Oh ok," Jenna replied "thank you Mrs. Kyle's Mom."

"Please call me Mrs. Broflovski," the woman replied cheerfully.

"Mrs. Broflovski," Jenna repeated "it was really nice meeting you."

"Oh you too Dear," Mrs. Broflovski said a Jenna waved goodbye.

As she walked away from the house her face dropped into this horrible frown "Oh well," she sighed "I guess I can wait to have a little fun."

Jenna found herself walking to Stan's "Guess I can't wait," she smirked as she reached forward to knock on the door.

The tap on the door caught the two boys off guard "Dude who the hell could that be?" Stan asked jumping up slightly

Kyle shrugged his shoulders "Maybe they'll go away if we ignore them."

"Maybe," Stan replied getting comfortable back on the couch.

Jenna knocked again this time is was harder, she was losing her calmness.

Stan sighed as he got off the couch and walked towards the door, he was surprised to see the new chick standing there.

"Hi boys," she said and giving him her sweet smile "can I come in?"

Stan glanced back at his friend still sitting on the couch who just shrugged his shoulders in response.

"Uh sure," Stan shrugged as he stood aside to let her pass.

"I brought a picnic for lunch," she said cheerfully as she passed

"A picnic?" Stan repeated

"You know...just in case we get hungry later," she explained sitting down the basket and finding a seat in between them.

Watching them play video games was really boring for her but it was still priceless knowing that she was making them feel uncomfortable.

"Besides video games is there anything else fun to do in this town?" she asked

"How come you want to hang around with us and not the other girls?" Kyle asked

Jenna looked up at him "You guys are way cooler than the girls."

"We are?" Stan asked

"Totally," she smiled

Kyle looked as if he wasn't buying it "Look no offense but it's just not normal for guys and chicks to be friends."

"Who says?" she asked folding her arms across her chest

"The Bro Code," he replied

Jenna just rolled her eyes "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard of."

"Yeah well that's just the rules," he said

She looked down at the ground and heaved a heavy sigh before bringing her face back to meet his. Then she very carefully placed her hand on top of his and that's when she knew she had him, he was going to be like putty in her hands.

"But I really don't have anything in common with the other girls," she said softly looking as if she was about to cry.

"What's not to have in common?" Stan asked "you are a girl like them."

"Well that's true," she replied "but you guys are way more fun."

Kyle was still sitting quietly with her hand on top of his and just staring into her eyes. "Dude are you alright?" Stan asked

No answer...

"Kyle!" Stan snapped waving his hand to try to get his friend's attention.

"Yeah?" Kyle asked finally blinking back into reality

"Are you feeling ok?" he asked

"Just fine," Kyle replied still looking at Jenna who smiled sweetly at him and gave him a quick wink. He felt his face go hot and he tried his best to hide it from his friend by turning his face away.

"Perfect," Jenna told herself before saying "who's hungry?"

She hopped off the couch and sat down by her basket "I made some sandwiches."

"What kind?" Stan asked

"Nothing fancy," she replied "just a couple of peanut butter and jelly ones."

"Cool," he shrugged deciding to sit down beside her and taking one.

When Kyle turned back towards them he felt really weird, he suddenly felt a ping of jealousy when he saw him sitting so close to her. He could feel it starting to run through his veins and hands ball into fists.

"Dude you have to try theses," Stan said holding out a sandwich for his friend "I don't know but she makes things taste better."

Jenna smiled "It's homemade jelly that my mom made."

"Cool Stan said again as he took another bite while still holding out the extra one for Kyle.

Kyle was having feeling he could not explain, apart of him wanted so much to kick Stan's ass but the other part of him knew it was because his friend wasn't doing anything. He finally shook his head took the sandwich and sat down beside them. They had just finished their lunch when Cartman walked.

"Hey fags!" he greeted all smiles but when he saw the new chick there he stopped dead in his tracks. "The fuck is going on here?" he asked "A threesome?"

"Dude you don't even know what a threesome is," Kyle retorted

"I do to Kyle!" he snapped "You dumb jew!"

"Oh yeah?" Kyle asked facing him "Then what is it?"

"Well maybe I don't want to tell you right now," Cartman shrugged

"That means he doesn't know," Kyle laughed as he told Jenna who smiled back.

Cartman glared at them "You guys are assholes."

Jenna cleaned up their mess and packed up her basket "Well boys I should be getting home."

"Thanks for the sandwiches!" Stan called from seat on the couch.

"Your welcome!" she called back as she walked towards the door. She let out a soft sigh as she exited the house and was just about to leave when it opened up behind her. She turned to see Kyle standing there.

"Jenna," he said shly

"Yeah?" she asked

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?" he asked lowering his head in defeat.

She smiled knowing that everything was going according to plan "Sure," she replied "I'd love to."

"Really?" he smiled "That's cool."

"Well I got to go," she said sweetly

"Oh ok," he replied

The next move she did was just icing on the cake but she very carefully placed a sweet kiss on his cheek and watched as his face turned red. She laughed to herself at the stupid look he got on his face. "See you later Kyle," she cooed

"Bye," he sighed waving as she walked away.

As she walked away she felt happy that soon very soon there was going to be a big fight that was going to ruin a friendship for years to come. Things could not get any better for her at the moment, she just loved how dumb boys could be when it came to pretty girl. How some are so willing to throw away a good friendship just for her. She did not care who got hurt in the process, just as long as she got a good laugh out of it.


	4. Chapter 4

Kyle could not explain it but he was suddenly head over heels in love with Jenna. Whenever she walked into a room, he would stop whatever he was doing and go rushing over to her side. This was driving his best friend crazy, he couldn't stand how there was never a time when Kyle was without her. Or if by the luck of God when they were hanging out she would call and just like that Kyle was off to be by her side drooling.

Stan sighed as he watched Kenny and Cartman beat the shit out of each other on the new game they were trying out.

"Aw does the Hippie miss his butt buddy?" Cartman asked he pressed all the buttons on the controller as fast as his hands would allow.

"Shut up Fatass!" he snapped back "I'm not in the fucking mood!"

"That's because you miss your boyfriend." Cartman laughed

Stan rolled his eyes, he was differently not in the mood for any of Cartman's crap. He decided that maybe the best place to be was not hanging out with a "Dickwad" like Cartman. So jumping off the couch he started walking towards the door "See you dudes later!" he mumbled

"Hmmm," Kenny muffled

But the depressed boy paid no attention and just walked off. "Maybe I could talk to Jenna?" He thought as he walked down the sidewalk. Before long he was standing at her front door ready to knock, he held his breath as he brought his hand back and knocked.

Within seconds the door opened and there stood Jenna all smiles. "Hi Stan!" she greeted "What brings you here?"

"Is Kyle here?" he asked

"No," she replied "Why?"

"Do you know where he is?"

"He just told me he would be right back," she explained "it's our two-day anniversary."

"Don't you think you and him are spending too much time together?" Stan asked

Jenna just giggled "We're a couple and we like spending time together."

"Yeah but..." Stan started to say but was quickly cut off by Jenna.

"But nothing!" she snapped "It's not like I'm forcing him to stay."

"Ever since you and him got together he hasn't been the same," Stan tried to explain but Jenna wasn't going to have any of it. Stan watched as her smile faded and her face became very dark looking.

Jenna grabbed him by the jacket collar "Listen here!" she yelled "Kyle would rather spend his time with me, SO GET OVER IT!"

Stan was wide-eyed from what he just saw "The hell is your problem?" he asked

She quickly let go as her face changed back to normal "Oh gosh," she said sweetly "I'm so sorry, I really don't know what came over me."

By which time Kyle had returned all smiles and holding out a small box, Jenna looked back at Stan and gave him a crooked smile.

"What do you have there?" she asked sweetly as she took the box and opened it.

"Dude we need to talk," Stan said to Kyle

"A CHARM BRACELET!" Jenna exclaimed before pulling Kyle into a hug to which the boy sighed and hugged her back not even paying attention to his friend standing right in front of them.

"Kyle?" Stan said trying to get his friend's attention but it was like he wasn't even there.

"Could you put it on me?" Jenna asked sweetly

"Sure," Kyle said taking the bracelet out of the box and placing it on her wrist.

"Dude what the hell?" Stan asked

Kyle looked up and for the first time noticed his friend standing there "Oh hey Dude," he greeted "when did you get here?"

"I've been here," Stan replied

"Sure," Kyle laughed "so when did you really get here?"

Stan rolled his eyes "Can we talk for a minute?"

Kyle looked from his friend to Jenna before sighing "Ok, but only for a minute."

Stan pulled Kyle out of Jenna's house "Dude you girlfriend crazy."

"No she's not!" Kyle snapped

"Yes she is," Stan replied "you should have seen her face change."

Kyle just shook his head "Oh Stan," he said smiling "I think you're just jealous."

"Jealous?" Stan questioned "No Dude, she grabbed me by the jacket just before you got here."

"No she didn't!" Kyle snapped "So stop lying!"

"I'm not lying!" Stan snapped back

"Kyle!" Jenna called from her doorway

"Coming!" he called back

"Kyle wait," Stan said making a grab for his friend's hand but Kyle moved it

"I have to go Stan," Kyle said bitterly before he turned to walked towards the girl standing in the doorway.

When Kyle had disappeared into the house Jenna gave Stan one last look which included an evil smirk and a wink before she closed the door.

xoxxoxoxoxxoxo

Jenna was so happy her plan was starting to fall into place, a big smile spread across her face as she walked to the bus stop.

"Hey new bitch," a voice greeted her from behind

"Eric," she said calmly and turning back towards the voice

"It's Cartman!" he shot back

"Whatever," she shrugged "what do you want?"

An evil grin formed on his pudgy face "My sources have informed that you like fucking up friendships."

Her eyes widened "How'd you know?"

He held out his hand and looked at it "Like I said, I have my sources."

"What are you going to do?" she asked "Tell on me?"

"Tell on you?" he laughed "No no why would I do that?"

"Because they're your friends," she replied

"Friends?" he snorted "I hate those guys."

She looked at him with a raised an eyebrow "No I have a better idea," he explained rubbing his two hands together.

"Like what?" she asked

"I want you to destroy their friendship so bad and once that's over I want you to break the Jew's heart."

"And what if I don't?" she asked placing her hands on her hips.

"Well I have ways of dealing with people who cross me," Cartman simply replied.

Jenna looked down at the ground for a minute "What's in for me if I do that?"

"How does fifty dollars sound?" Cartman asked

"Like a rip off," Jenna replied

Cartman sighed "Fine," he lied "I'll pay you one hundred dollars."

Jenna thought it over for a second before holding out her hand "Deal."

"Deal," Cartman smiled.

xoxxoxoxoxoxxoxo

Stan rolled his eyes as he turned away from the couple sitting across from him on the bus holding hand and hand. He instead pressed his head against the cold bus window and let a sigh escape his mouth. Kyle was just being stubborn that's all, he would get over it soon. When the bus stopped he went straight to his locker to grab a few things and just about to head to class when Jenna stepped in front of him.

He was just about to walk around her when she grabbed his jacket collar again and before he had time to react she had pulled him forward and planted a kiss right on his lips.

"You dirty bastard," Stan heard Kyle's voice say as he pushed Jenna away from him.

"Dude she kissed me," he tried to explain but Kyle wasn't listening.

"I thought you were my friend Stan?" he asked

"I am,"

"Friends don't go around kissing their friend's girlfriends," Kyle replied

"Dude I don't even like her,"

"That's not what it looked like to me," Kyle said with fire in his eyes.

Jenna quickly rushed over to Kyle's side "He's lying," she lied "he kissed me."

"Dude that's not what happened," Stan explained "I was just heading to class when she blocked me and kissed me."

"STOP LYING!" Kyle snapped clenching his hands into fists "I should kick you ass!"

All the commotion had the other kids all gathered around chanting "Fight..fight ...fight."

"Dude we have to get to class," Stan explained

"Fine," Kyle replied folding his arms "then after school, we finish this."

Stan opened his mouth to say something but Kyle grabbed Jenna and shoved past him causing him to fall back into the lockers. Jenna shot one last look back at Stan before her and Kyle entered Mr. Garrison's class.

**Thanks for the reviews, they really mean a lot to me. Love you lots! :D Please reviews motivate me so please leave one. I would also like to ad that I do not own SP just Jenna and the plot. Sorry for any typos.**


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